Scroll
by Sayaka-sama
Summary: Naruto drabbles by yours truly fresh off the LJ community! Everything ranging from humor to angst to grade A fluff.
1. Orange

Orange 

"Hey, dumbass."

"Yes, sempai?"

Just another mission, another break from their travels in the clearing of an endless forest. Tobi kneeled before the heap of twigs and bark, a match and tinder in either of his hands. Deidara sat cross-legged in the weave of long grass and wheat behind him.

"What's with the fucking mask?"

Not taking mind of his partner's curt choice of words, he smiled brightly behind the anonymity of his porcelain veil. He learned over the past couple of weeks that the replacement of his given name with some sort of imaginative, degrading label was mostly done out of habit. Things were still somewhat questionable between the two of them (unstable was more like it), but Tobi shrugged it off with a hidden grin, and Deidara had learned to muddle along and deal as well.

As much as his sempai liked to believe so, Tobi wasn't entirely an idiot. Deidara-sempai didn't always mean what he said.

"What about it?"

"It's _orange, _that's what. Un."

The day never came to a close until the clay-artist threatened to _blow his sorry ass sky-high, un._

In layman's terms, he really wanted to kill him.

"I know. I guessed I've just always liked orange. It's different, you know, sempai? Not as deep as red, not as bright as yellow, and not as dark as green or blue. It's perfect in it's own way."

And yet, he was still alive.

And not that it needed noting, but his tush was still entirely intact, also.

"I couldn't care about the color itself. You're just a walking target, is what I'm trying to say, un. Anyone, a shinobi or a hunter-nin, could pick your stupid face out in a crowd, and that would be the story of you."

Tobi was no idiot.

He felt that Deidara-sempai did not wish him dead anytime soon.

"That's fine with me, sempai." His smile grew against the inside of his mask.

"What a retard, un. I hope someone does kill you. Honestly, you'd think the Leader would flay pansies like you alive for even _looking_ at him. But he just up and intiates you. Christ..." And his mumbling continued on like that.

Deidara-sempai didn't always mean what he said.

"I am still alive, Deidara-sempai."

Someday, he reasoned, being the artist that he was, he would see that orange wasn't all that bad.

* * *

Written for sharingank because I luffs her so.


	2. Frost

**Frost******

From his side of the bed, Kakashi could pick up the tremors that echoed into his mattress and reverberated into his pillow, followed by a violent shifting to his right. Even though he floated between alertness and slumber, he clearly registered the clacking of teeth and the scrape of calloused fingertips running up and down the skin of smooth forearms.

"Anko...?" He murmured, his tongue heavy with exhaustion.

"Yeah?"

"Stop that" And with that he turned back on his side.

"Ass. You could at _least_ be so considerate as to inquire what's wrong with me," she bit back through quivering lips. She pulled the thick duvet around her bare skin tightly, which resulted in Kakashi losing a few inches of comforter on his end.

He turned back to her. "Oh?"

Silence reigned over them for the better half of a minute.

So he was going to be difficult, huh?

"_Well?_"

"Well what?"

She didn't bother with a retort.

With a twisted glaze in her drooping eyes -they gave off something between irritation and cleverness- she exacted his punishment for his "jackassery", as she so called it.

With a flick of her wrist, she wrenched even more of the duvet and curled it around her.

As for Kakashi?

He cracked an eye open and abruptly discovered that he had no duvet left for him to curl up in.

He sighed, eyeing the mass of comforter next to him in desperation.

"_What's wrong?_" He grumbled as he tugged at the fabric that Anko hid herself in.

About time.

She slowly relinquished her hold on a small portion of the thick duvet and turned on her side.

"I'm chilly. That's what's wrong."

Before Anko could do anything else, Kakashi snuck under the unraveled portion of comforter, curling his arm around the deep slope of her waist while his nose burrowed itself in her hair.

"You could've just said that."

She barely had the time to smile before she dozed off, the chill in her spine melting.


	3. Icha Icha Indulgence

**Icha Icha Indulgence **

Ino stared, her eyebrow twitching slightly while she tried her utmost to soak in the scene before her.

Naruto gawked, his ocean blue eyes expanding against the skin of his cheeks while a cluster of drool formed at the corner of his drooping jaw unnoticed.

Sakura simply rolled her eyes.

"Will you two cut that out? If I've sprouted some new appendage without my knowing please tell me. Otherwise, if you have the time to gawk at me, then go do something productive."

Ino decided to break the spell first.

"Sakura... wha-" She stopped for a second to gather her thought into words.

Naruto gave it a try.

"Sakura-chan, _you..._"

Nada.

Sakura gave off a growl quietly and through clenched teeth, she spoke. **"Spit it out already, you twits."**

"Sakura, sweety, you _do_ realize that's Icha Icha Paradise in your hands, right?"

"Yes."

Naruto swallowed before he spoke.

"And you do know what's in it... _right_?"

She gazed up from the confines of her newly-acquired book and paused for a moment.

A Cheshire Cat's smile quietly eeked onto her face.

"_Of course_, I do."

While Ino and Naruto managed a few more minutes of disbelieving silence, Sakura - newly found closet pervert- licked her thumb and flipped a page.

* * *

Have I ever mentioned how much I lurve writing perverted!Sakura? XD 


	4. Mary

Tobi, Hidan,... and a lamb: "sacrifice" for firefly XD

* * *

Mary

"Tobi. Put. It. Down."

No matter how many times he grit those four words through his teeth, Hidan only found deaf ears, a pleading whimper, and a head of mishmashed black hair shaking sagely in refusal.

Also, he found arms that constricted gingerly around the dainty, frail lamb that slept in his embrace.

"Tobi," Hidan seethed deviously, "Give me the motherfucking lamb, _now._"

But Tobi still sat, cross-legged, chin furrowing deeper into ticklish white wool while he groaned in reluctance.

A voice from the doorway interrupted.

"And you wonder why this retard makes me pull my hair out, un. I can't even dream of what _you'd_ do to him if the Leader paired the two of you up."

Hidan could only grind his jowls harder.

"Next time, Altar Boy, don't leave the damn door open, un."

* * *

Leave it to Deidei to keep his uke from being skewered. XDDD 


	5. Muzzle

Kiba/Sakura: "teeth" for Darkflameangel

* * *

Muzzle

Before she could even finish blinking, he was crouching defensively in the far corner of the room.

"Kiba," Sakura chided, "Cut that out and get over here. It'll only take a few seconds."

He glared ardently at the syringe lodged between her svelte fingers.

"Sod off. I'm not getting a shot, woman."

"Kiba, all people are due for their tetanus shots every ten years, and you're just about due, so could we _please_ get this over and done with?"

"Over my bloody carcass."

Sadly for Sakura, being under Hippocratic Oath meant barring back any and all urges to beat her assigned patient into submission -no matter how willing she was to do so. So it took a hard bite to the inside of her cheek before she could calm down enough to walk to the far side of the examination room and crouch in front of the gruff Chuunin before her.

"Now, now," she whispered softly, the corners of her lips elevating, "I promise I won't make it hurt, okay? And if you're a good boy, I might even reward you with a lollipop afterwards." Smiling slightly, she offered her right hand. "Come on, Kiba. It's not the end of the worl-"

The blunt tip of his fangs pushed down gently -yet firmly- on the flesh of her fingertips.

She blinked.

"Kiba, did you just _bite_ me?"

He grinned slyly.

"Maybe."

* * *

There, there Kiba. I used to bite my doctor too. XD 


	6. Presentation

Zetsu/Hidan: "smooth" for Darkflameangel

* * *

Presentation

It was an inlaid fact among the many peons under the Leader's command that Hidan could be rather... creative in verbal terms when intimidated. Kisame, at one point, prodded at him as to why he felt it necessary to keep his chest exposed for a good portion of the day - breakfast not excluded.

_"Hate to break your heart, boy, but we're not getting off on seeing your torso out in the open. Put a damn shirt, would ya?" _

"Go fuck a dolphin, Ariel."

Days like those where he couldn't be more grateful to be 'unkillable'.

No matter how hard he tried though, while he held the crown for creativity, it was Zetsu who had the art of smooth delivery down to a science.

Observe.

"Fuck man, you're a cannibal and a schizophrenic with a... a God-knows-what extruding from your damn shoulders."

"And?" _"Your point is?"_

"Christ, you... Who the _fuck_ gave birth to you?"

"Heh." _"You know, Slick, that questions keeps us up at night..."_

Hidan couldn't really say he was accepting of the term "Slick".

"You're a goddamn loon..."

_"So spake he who skewers himself on a ritual basis."_

Touché.

Hidan's face was still for a moment.

"... Hmph. Cheeky bastard..."

Zetsu won.

* * *

Yeah... that's the best I could hack up. 


	7. Take Down

Kisame/Hinata: "fairy queen" (I kid you not) for themadpoker on LJ

* * *

Take Down

He was down. He was out. And he was coughing up portions of his insides while he felt his vision darken with each passing second.

Hyuuga. He probably should have assumed this much from a Hyuuga, but...

... the poor chum was a bit of a slow learner.

The cream-eyed girl -_Lord, Zetsu could swallow her whole, she's so freakin' tiny_- stood above him, frozen in a Jyuuken style defensive pose while she panted raggedly. There was something mixed in her eyes, something almost indecipherable.

A mix of mortification for what she had just done... (_Oh God, oh God, I just killed someone, I just took someone's life, oh God..._)

... and self-satisfaction as well. (_Naruto-kun's safe. He's safe, now._)

Kisame coughed again, eyes narrowing at the dainty little thing standing over him.

_Taken down by a fucking pixie. Itachi'll never let me hear the end of this..._

* * *

I REFUSE TO WRITE FLUFF WITH THESE TWO. I REFUSE 


	8. Mint

Kotetsu/Sakura: "candy cane" for Darkflameangel

* * *

Mint

"Goddamnit... ERGH."

Mission. Gruesome one. One involving an ambush, some explosive tags, and a whole mess of uprooted trees and massive craters.

The end results? One incapacitated Kotetsu and one very Sakura who was visibly frustrated for the lack of chakra that could have better healed his arm.

_Has she got a stick up her ass or something? It's just a broken arm..._

Well... broken in three places, actually.

"Shit," she sniffed, "I can't do anything else, but... I hate leaving people like this when I know I could do better..."

"Tearing up doesn't become you, hon."

"What, you got something that'll make me sto-"

Before she could finish, her answer came.

Kotetsu let his fingers drop from the candy cane he pulled out of his Chuunin vest and perched between her lips.

She blinked at him slowly, the moisture in her vivid green eyes all but forgotten.

"Kotetsu?"

He smiled, pinched her cheek affectionately as he spoke.

"Cheer up, kiddo."

* * *

Teehee. XD 


	9. Weave

Kankuro/Temari: "scarves" for sharingank. I LURVE YOU. 3

* * *

Weave

The cautious, delicate movements of her narrow fingers halted for a moment.

"Kano?"

A reply echoed from the kitchen. "What?"

"Does this look like a scarf to you?"

An empty pause.

"Are you _still_ knitting? For Christ's sake, Temari, what the crap are you going to need a scarf for in the middle of _June?_"

"Shit-can it for once, would you? I'm just trying something new, I never said I was gonna wear the damn thing..."

He sneered mockingly from the kitchen entrance.

"So you're wasting valuable material that could be better utilized for the sake of, oh I don't know, people freezing in the North Pole or wherever, just so you can pick up a new hobby?"

Her glare would have made him keel spontaneously, had he never been subject to it before.

"Yes, smartass. Yes, I am."

He peered from behind the couch she sat on to observe her latest handiwork, his grin expanding.

"You're wicked personified, kiddo," Kankuro murmured brightly, and he lightly pressed his lips to the crown of her head before ruffling up the strands of dark gold that grew there.

She couldn't help but smile slightly. "You didn't answer my question, though."

He pondered for a moment before he turned on his heel back to the kitchen.

"If all else fails, sweetheart, you can always use it as a table cloth."

He just barely missed the needle aimed for his cranium.

* * *

YESH. :D 


	10. Peek

Oh my _Lord_, I love this one. XD Shikamaru/Sakura: "black panties" for Darkflameangel

* * *

Peek

Tendril after tendril of sweat trickled down from his temple and travelled down his chin.

For the past week or so, he'd been down with a rather nasty fever that left him bedridden and for the most part, he was quite content milking a few rounds of shogi and cloud-gazing out of it.

Leave it to his mother, though, to draw the line somewhere and shoo him out of his bedroom and into the local clinic.

At this moment, however, the source of his sudden lapse of heat was not due to his current ailment.

Haruno Sakura, fellow Rookie Niner and the medic assigned for his visit, groaned in frustration while she groped around on the floor for the only pen she had at her disposal.

Completely oblivious to the hell she was putting Shikamaru through...

From where he sat, he was being provided with entertainment via the elevated hem of her almost-too-small top. The well-defined contour of her spine wormed out from the shadow of fabric, as did the hollows that contracted -in... and out- with every movement of her narrow body. Daring to observe more, he took into account the lithe dip of her waist that deepened and flattened beautifully in turns, while her hips swayed slightly.

To make matters more unbearable, out of the corner of his eye, he could spot just the teeniest, tiniest, sheerest patch of black lace peek out from the waistband of her shorts.

He gulped, almost audibly, and he looked up to find Sakura looking back at him, concern glimmering in her stare.

"Shikamaru, are you sure it's just a fever? Because your face is really red right now..."

The knuckle of his thumb quickly disposed of the sweatdrops lingering below his lips.

"I'm sure," he managed to croak out.

* * *

OH SHIKAMARU, HOW I LURVE MAKING THINGS TROUBLESOME FOR YE. XDDD 


	11. Shift

Gaara/Temari: "tool" for Darkflameangel

* * *

Shift

The two lay side by side in silence, breathing in the wind that hovered over the rooftop they occupied.

A boy on the left and a girl on the right.

Temari sighed slightly, not expecting Gaara to respond in some way and not particularly minding.

She wondered just how this had come about.

She remembered trembling in his shadow, her body quivering whenever she felt his anger flare or his patience reach his end.

That was three years ago.

She remembered a reformed boy, slowly shifting to something else, something that wasn't quite human just yet but was by no means a monster. Not anymore.

That was two and a half years ago.

She remembered the sand ruffling into the crevices of his white robes, his eyes hidden under the anonymity of his hat. Even though the sun was glaring down on him mercilessly and wind pounded wildly against his figure, she could've sworn she spotted the smallest beginnings of a smile growing on his face, as he turned and walked into his first day as Kage of the Hidden Sand.

That was months before.

She remebered his eyes closed, the persistent furrow of his brow no longer there, and skin that grew paler with each second.

That was just a day ago.

She saw her brother's weary and worn face, his eyes closed once again, his chest rising and falling almost unnoticeably.

That was now.

Tears poured out relentlessy, her sobs quiet and breathy.

She wondered how this had come about, how by some deity's working, this boy who dreamt to the left of her had shifted from a tool of a desperate nation to a desperate nation's shepherd.

A boy sleeping on the left and a girl crying to the right.

The two lay side by side in silence, breathing in the wind that hovered over the rooftop they occupied.

* * *

Oh SandSibs, thou art the nectar of my being. :3 


	12. Splinter

Yamato/Sakura: "splinter" for Darkflameangel

* * *

Splinter 

"Urgh... ow..."

"What's wrong, Taichou?"

He winced for a brief moment before turning to look at Sakura.

"Nothing," he murmured, "Just got a splinter on my palm, that's all...-"

Before he could finish his complaint, her hand grasped his wrist gently while a tendril of foam-green chakra weaved into the palm of his hand and slowly, discreetly, pulled out the pesky wooden sliver.

Smiling, she lightly kissed the vacant, formerly-splintered spot on his hand before her fingers slipped from his arm.

"All better, Taichou," she chirped while Yamato blankly stared at his open hand.

* * *

BETH, YOU'RE KILLING MEEEEEEEEEEEE. 


	13. Investment

Anko, Temari: "mesh" for yokochan on LJ

* * *

Investment 

"You know, sweetcakes, you could really profit something if you wear a little bit more mesh than just that."

Temari of the Sand simply gaped at the Chuunin Instructor standing next to her, who was apparently trying to strike up a conversation out of nowhere while they waited for the next preliminary match.

"The hell's that supposed to mean?"

"What good is a little patch of fishnet over your shoulders and on your legs? Go nuts, man."

"And you're trying to talk to me about mesh because...?"

Anko's signature wry smile crept slowly onto her face. "It's a 'natural enhancer', so to speak. "Cause let's face it, sister, you've got bugbites for boo-"

Before Anko could elaborate further, Temari willed her ears shut and kept her eyes on the floor below.

She couldn't will away the raging blush of her cheeks, however.

_No, they're _**_not

* * *

_**

Cheer up, Itty Titties... I mean, Temari. XDDD


	14. Fanbase: NarutoOuran Crossover

Naruto/Ouran crossover: "textbook" for themadpoker on LJ

* * *

Fanbase 

"Could I _please_ go back to the library? I left my textbooks there."

"Once we're done, princess."

"I am **not** going through with this, Senpai."

Tamaki only tsked for a brief moment before he grinned smugly.

"Now, now, Haruhi, when Daddy says he provides for all walks of life, he **means** it. A large portion of the Host Club's customers belong to fanbases of different varieties; shounen manga, shoujo manga, yaoi, yuri, and everything else in between!"

"That doesn't justify what you're making me do right now, I hope you realize..." Haruhi seethed through clenched teeth.

"Of course, it does! You're contributing to a new addition of the Ouran High School Host Club's Photobook Collection! Just think, precious!"

Snarling, she tugged fervently at the mesh collar, at the same time scratching at the blonde wig done up into four separate ponytails.

"I. Hate. Wigs."

The twins, who stood nearby, smirked evilly.

"Deal with it, princess."

* * *

Erm... yes. I know this only remotely related to the keyword "textbook" but that was all I could think of. 


	15. Scavenger

Anko/Iruka: "leather and lace" for Darkflameangel

* * *

Scavenger

"You'd look _exceptionally_ hot in leather, you know..."

"Anko, what're you-"

"Like this, see? Form fitting, sleek... delicious, man."

Iruka rolled his eyes slightly. "Anko, cut that out."

"We could always get one with frills, though," Anko purred slyly. "We could start something new."

"I'd rather not."

"Stuff like this should be _enjoyable_ for the two of us, no? Take my advice, kiddo."

Iruka stomped on his foot. "For Christ's sake, Anko, we're shopping for _jackets_, not lingerie, so do you mind putting an end to your little innuendo tirade?"

Her face fell slightly as she shrugged and hung the leather jacket back on the rack.

"Suit yourself..."

* * *

Yeah... XD 


End file.
